Get Out Of My Blog!

Once upon a time I was a tiny child waiting in line next to my Primary school teacher’s desk.  When the line got round to me, the teacher was not best impressed as I had seemingly wandered off into a fantasy world – one in which I felt the need to stretch my arms out and mutter NYERERERRRRRRRNOOOOWWWWW <pause> ARAKKADAKKAPRAKKA under my breath.Obviously my teacher thought I was nuts.  Also obviously the correct response to being asked disdainfully if I could wait until morning break to “play Spitfires” was not, “But Miss - I’m a Hawker Hurricane!”.Yes, at that precise moment I was most definitely not waiting to hand in my latest English assignment in a dusty classroom, but was actually leaping hedgerows with my throttle through the gate, hot on the tail of the dastardly Hun that had just put paid to my wingman, Lofty.Yes, I read a whole load of those god-awful Commando comics as well.This is all a really long-winded way of announcing the fact that Russian mega-publisher 1C_Company are bringing the hardest of hardcore flight sims, Maddox Games Il-2 Sturmovik to PS3 and 360, complete with console-n00b friendly difficulty tweaks, and lushly redone graphics.  I for one, having played my fill of Ace Combat, H.A.W.X. and the deplorably cruddy Blazing Angels am really quite excited at the prospect of some realistic multiplayer dogfighting.

“You should have been playing this on PC since 2001, you fucking lolcat!” yell the hardcore sim-ers.  “Fuck you!” I retort swiftly, “I get my sorry arse handed to me on a regular basis by the hordes of overmedicated ADHD tweenagers on XBL, do you really think I want to expose myself to a merciless goatse-ing from the basement-dwelling neckbeards that have been wrapped in a cocoon of monitors, playing this exact game on PC for the last ten years?!?”Under my breath I add, “…and the graphics no longer look like PlayStation 1 era cruft any more as well…”In short: 360 Demo up today, Wednesday 29^th July on Xbox Live! here in Blighty - see you online!  NYYYYOORRRRRONOWNOWNNOOOOOOWWW!! 

This entry was posted Wednesday, July 29th, 2009 at 6:38 am and is filed under Postage. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.